For some time I’ve held an interest in Buddhism and Zen, and have read a number of books on the subject. I’m also a reader of Zen Habits, by Leo Duchovny, David Duchovny’s younger brother.
I would argue that Leo’s blog has very little relationship to Zen (*cough* false advertising *cough*), and in fact I would suggest that a more appropriate title would be “Nice guy habits”. But that doesn’t really have the same ring to it.
Zen isn’t really about being nice, or being organised, getting things done, being productive, or any of that hoo-ha. Why do people even care so much about these stupid things? Being productive? Woohoo, way to go, mark that down as your headstone quote.
Zen, without the Buddhism, is simply about living in the present moment, and meditating a lot to get good at that.
So, with that out of the way, Supernifty will now, as is the fashion in blogs, preach with a list of ways to be awesome.
1. Be nice
No.
Ever hear the saying, “nice guys finish last”? Well, it’s true. This means that being nice results in a double whammy of suckfullness. First, you have to be nice. Second, you come last.
Being grumpy, and bad, is the alternative personality to aim for. Grumpiness is fun, and helps you live longer. Also, grumpy people are pretty funny. John McEnroe for instance. His grumpiness gives him an ongoing income stream: every time someone says “you cannot be serious” on commercial television, he gets a dollar.
Girls love bad. You just have to watch TV to know this. There’s even scientific evidence indicating as such.
Unfortunately, if you are too bad, you might end up in jail. Supernifty life tip: avoid jail. This means aiming to be in the smart bad end of town, the guys that don’t get caught. If you think you might be in the stupid bad category, maybe you should just be good instead.
2. Patience is a virtue
No.
I’ve spent a lot of time waiting around for stuff and generally, it’s a waste of time. Time is the one thing you can never get more of in your life so don’t spend it being patient. Seize the day, and don’t wait another moment to go fix yourself a big sugary treat.
3. Only the good die young
Actually no, it’s mainly the bad guys dying young by killing each other, and themselves. Drinking, smoking or shagging themselves to death. Not taking care of themselves, driving too fast, taking stupid risks. All that stuff is the domain of the baddies.
But doesn’t it sound like fun? You only live once, do you want that one life to be the boring, long, life of the nice guy?
4. Live in the moment
Zen tells us the only moment is now.
So forget the past, and forget the future (i.e. consequences of your actions). Do whatever the hell you want, and do it right now.
* Please don’t take all aspects of this article seriously. I actually quite like Leo’s blog.
There have been a number of updates, improvements and even a new version of 